the final hour

I know you have been waiting for a miracle to happen.
But, deep in your heart, you know that it's just wishful thinking.
You of all people should know better to hope for the hopeless.

Why do you think you can help others when you can't either help yourself?
Self-denial is not going to get you anywhere you wish you would be.
The reality is what you know it is.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself and think that as if it's out of your control.
Your knowledge clearly tells you the opposite.
You know that you can be happy...


I know it's down to the final hour but what is a man in love got to do?
Time and time again you tell me that I am just imagining things and that I am going to get over it.
But, the truth is it always seems to be contradicted.

You think I long a miracle, I think I long for fresh start.
But, maybe at the end of this race, we end up at the very beginning.
This beginning which we both think that shouldn't have embarked on.
But, since the journey has began, I should just go where the roads me to.
So, maybe you should stop telling me to abandon it all together.



Life is full of surprises.
Sometimes you are happy, sometimes you are sad.
You make friends who say they will walk you through your life and also friends who walks with you.
You make decisions that you think is right but deemed by others as wrong.
You learn to listen but often talk too much.
You learn to see but often miss things out.
You feel pain too often when there isn't a wound.
You feel frustrated thinking that it wasn't your day.
You feel unlucky even when you are still kicking.

There are so many things that you learn, do, make and feel that it's impossible to list them all.
Fate leads in your own hands.
After this final hour, maybe we both can say that we won't need to see each other again.

Tick Tick Tick

Tick...tick...tick...

The red?The blue?The black?

or None?

Sometimes its as simple as blowing it out...

...then again...

...sometimes its not.

An update

Since, the last entry nothing much happened but I guess I should do some update at least on my current job. But, before I go into that, I just want to mention that DI is going to prepare for the moving to Lavender later in the year. I wonder whether a new environment will be good. But from the way things look, probably not.

In school, I am definitely learning more and more interesting things which is so relevant to life.

Basically, I am really happy with this job. No matter how I compare, its still better than the previous. Although, now I am only into my third week, I am already offered to convert. I have accepted the offer, now pending for HR to process the details before I sign and make things official.

An update feels so familiar yet so distant.
A feeling that was in the distant past, suddenly returns as a familiar present.